Four Months Old

Time goes by so quickly.

Today my baby boy is 17 weeks old. Tomorrow will be March 9th: four months since he was born. Four months!

I know maybe to people who don't have kids, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal, or that a four month old is any much less of a baby than a newborn...but to me, four months has been a HUGE expanse of time and experiences.

The baby that i gave birth to 17 weeks ago was a tiny, bewildered, sleepy little boy who needed me to shield him. He needed to inch his way up next to me, to bury his face into the crook of my arm and to fall asleep there while his senses tried to adjust to a loud and busy world.

Today as I write this, just four short months later, that same baby is sitting behind me jumping up and down in his bouncer. He is reaching for a toy giraffe and putting it in his mouth to see what it tastes like. He just pushed a button on the bouncer to make it play music. He's amazing. He's incredible.

My four month old can look around, he can hold his head up, he can sit on my lap and reach out and grab things. The other night he was sitting on his dad and I went over and handed him a toy and walked away. He took it from me. That's amazing! He is now a person you can hand things to.

He's over there right now playing by himself and having a great time.

Not to even mention the changes in his physical appearance. He was so tiny, so little when i first had him. Now he's this BIG baby boy! Healthy, happy, literally a bouncing baby boy!

So many times over the past four months I have found myself overwhelmed or freaking out, looking at the clock and thinking, "okay just a few more hours until Ryan gets home/until bed time/until naptime/whatever" but now i think back and I want to push pause even on those moments where i felt like the world was caving in because it all goes by too fast.

He's four months old already, he wants to crawl and sit and talk and after that he'll want to walk and run and then he'll let go of my hand and take off and I will be left watching him proudly but still feeling the ever slightest ache in my heart that i don't have that tiny little bundle to wrap up in my arms and sit on my lap.

Four months. He's a blessing and a miracle and I cherish every single moment i've had with him these past four months. I cannot wait to see what the next four bring...just not TOO quickly i hope.